………and I’m still in the same place in life. I haven’t progressed onwards and upwards as I’d encourage people on a few of my Instagram posts. I’m literally in the same place as where I was a year on. Sad, but true.

I guess that’s where running comes into play. There are so many things in my life I can’t control. Whereas I find that with running, I can. Whatever I choose to put into my running, is what I get out of it. More on this later I guess.

Unfortunately, captions are one of my greatest weaknesses so it’s a little ironic I’m attempting to keep a blog. If I’m being honest, I’m not at that point in my life yet where I can truly express certain views. For example, when women post about empowerment. As much as I wish I could, I’m still trying to dig deep and search for that myself.

What I’m currently doing is trying to find freedom. I’m trying to find my place in this World. I’m trying to find the answers as to why God has given me this life. I’ve feel that I’ve so much to give yet I feel restricted from giving my all. And giving my all means to me. To myself. I give so much to everything around me and ask for nothing in return. Yet I get nothing in return.

I was driving home one day and stopped a few metres from a set of traffic lights. I noticed up ahead a short lane to turn right. You can only merge into this short lane from the middle lane. So if you’re in the middle lane and need to get into the short lane to turn right, you need to wait for the cars infront of you to continue driving forward. Then I thought. Yep, this scenario sums up my life perfectly.

I’m in the middle lane and the cars infront of me are in my way. I need to get into the short lane to turn right because I need to get somewhere. But I can’t move until the cars move first. Otherwise, how else can I get to where I need to go?

Needless to say, I’m stuck. And obviously I have major concerns in life I’m trying to address. Until then, I’ll be unable to inspire and convey a level of positivity. I’m actually really afraid that I might die young without having even tried.

I always tell people that if you ask me what’s new in 6 months to a year’s time, I can almost guarantee you to “check back with me then and I bet you I’ll be in the same place as where I am right now.” I’m trying to change that mindset though. But the progress is slow.

I’m unsure how to close this post so I’ll leave this as is.